Today I am…

Who am I today?  I saw a post on Facebook that is circulating, its a picture frame that you insert your photo in, with the words “Be careful who you call ugly in middle school I’m still ugly but that was pretty mean” . My thoughts are today as an adult, why did I ever let what the nasty kids I went to school with bother me with there words.  That was all on me, yeah I was bullied, and at the time, my feelings were hurt, hell, one time my body was hurt because one of the bullies was sitting on me, infuriated that I would not fight back.  (Oddly enough, the last time I saw her she was starting a anti bullying campaign at her daughter’s school.  Irony at its best as she does not remember being a bully to me).

Today I am a confident person, I am strange, we all are, that’s what makes us unique beings.  I don’t care what the world thinks of me, I am who I am, and I am happy.  My lifestyle may be a bit not conventional, but I am a happy.

I wake up every morning to birds chirping in my back yard (and wee Loki meowing).  I have ample time to prepare for my day, although I want to modify the morning and evening routine to add my Pilates workout.  Its a 30 minute each time of a workout that I know I can do correctly.  It will build my core and flexibility, hopefully reducing my lower back pain.

Yesterday’s appointment with my Doc was very productive.  I sometimes wonder if he is using my appointment as a therapy session in addition to a medical review, and if so, which one of us is getting therapy?  Its was as if he did not believe me when I said everything  going well.  The part that was productive, we found the source of my hip problem, which is a contributing factor to the lower back pain.  I need to not cross my legs when sitting, I am putting undo strain on my hip. The mid back pain was solved by the purchase of four new bras, two for day and two for night.  The lower back pain, that’s were we kind of have a difference of opinion.  He suggests yoga, I am fearful that I will do damage from doing it wrong.  He suggests some YouTube videos on SI stretching.  One that I watched says the misalignment of the pubic, sacral and ileum bones can be caused by doing yoga wrong, among other things.   I have started doing the stretch for the SI, it is not a very comfortable stretch.

He shared his experience with yoga, how he combined videos with what he learned in a couple sessions.  I have done very well with the Pilates in the past as well as the stretches from the physio.  I plan to resume those, and maybe take a yoga class some rainy weekend.  The idea of doing yoga on the beach does not appeal to me.  My beach time is my time with the God and Goddess.

I have yet to start swimming in the morning or even attempting to catch waves.  There are no waves, the surf is probably measured in inches.  I am told the wind is from the west, therefore no surf conditions. I was there at low tide today and I think I am going to explore making shell jewelry.    The materials are provided by nature, and I am sure people that live far away from the beach would like to have a piece of the beach in their realm.

Doc suggested I engage in some mind building activities, I am thinking crafts.  I did not share with him that I am currently using an app to learn French and refresh my Spanish.  I have this blog that I am intending to become a daily event.